I was someone who loved school. Not everyone does, but I did. And one of my favorite things was group projects. You would be assigned to a group and we all would have a task to do together. Quickly you found out who were the generals–who would take charge, the talkers, the doers and the thinkers. In a good group project, everyone does what they are best at.
Here’s the point: Life is a group project. It is how God created us. We are relational beings that need others. And God wants to use people in your life to help you move toward His plan and purpose for your life.
WALKING WITH FOOLS
“Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.” Proverbs 13:20 (NIV)
In this verse, if we walk with the wise, what do we become? Wise. If we associate with fools–what will happen? You will get in trouble. So, if you hang out with people who are more mature than you, wiser than you, smarter than you, have stronger marriages than you, are better with money than you, are better leaders than you, you’re going to become like them.
Show me your friends and I’ll show you your future. Life is a group project.
WHO ARE YOUR FOUR CLOSEST FRIENDS?
So, who are your closest friends? Not counting a spouse or family or your dog (I know it won't be your cat), who are your closest friends?
Who is it you could call at 3am, the people you can tell most anything to, they know you, they could open your refrigerator and it wouldn’t be awkward? Who are four friends that fall into this category?
Here’s the point: Experts tell us that you are the average of your four closest friends. You will be somewhere in the middle of the average of your four closest friends. Because your mom was right all along: You become like who you hang-out with.
So, if you want to grow spiritually–are you with people who want to grow spiritually? If you want a good marriage–are you with people who have a good marriage? Do you want to be stronger in financial matters? Are you with people who are good with financial matters? You are just a few spiritual friendships away from changing your path to be on God’s path for you.
BUT THERE’S A PROBLEM
“A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.” Proverbs 17:17 (NIV)
Experts tell us that only a few of us have many of those sort of friends anymore. Everytime I have asked a group or in a sermon to think of four friends like I did earlier in this blog, the response is the same–they can’t come up with four of those type friends they have in their life.
But we have to invest, engage, and commit to having these sort of friends in our lives. I could not make it through my challenges, disappointments, and discouragements without having my friends in my life. It is God’s plan for us–to have friends that help us.
HOW SPIRITUAL FRIENDSHIPS HELP US:
They make us better. We all need a community of people around us that guide us spiritually, where you learn from them and they learn from you, and you make each other better. Where they love you enough to tell you the truth when you’re doing something stupid, where they love you enough to confront you when you are on a path that will hurt you. Where they love you enough to celebrate with you in good times. “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.” Proverbs 27:17 (NIV). We all need someone that make us better in God’s plan.
They help you find spiritual strength. In the Old Testament, Jonathan and King David were friends. David was being hunted for his life. Here’s what Jonathan did: “David stayed in the wilderness strongholds and in the hills of the Desert of Ziph. Day after day Saul searched for him, but God did not give David into his hands. While David was at Horesh in the Desert of Ziph, he learned that Saul had come out to take his life.“1 Samuel 23:14-15 (NIV). He helped him find strength in God. Every one of us, no matter what need friends who will help you find spiritual strength. Because no matter how strong you think you are, you will get defeated, tempted and you will need people who walk in and say: I’m with you. I’m going to pray for you. I’m going to help you find strength in the Lord.
They will tell you the truth. “Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ.“ Ephesians 4:15 (NIV). We all have a great capacity to deceive ourselves. We need friends who will help us see the truth about ourselves. So, we can grow up spiritually.
Without the power of God, without people in your life that can help you live this out, you won’t take steps toward Jesus. My prayer for you is that you take action about having spiritual friends in your life. Take action. Talk to someone and ask: Do you eat lunch? I do too. Let’s go together. And then let God work. Because life is a group project.
